We ’ve all find a little burned by superpowered easy lay - comedy Heroes , but we recall tonight ’s midseason premiere deserves one more chance . And to overcome your disbelief , we ’ve compiled not 10 , but 63 reasons why . plunderer !
Here are our reasons to give Heroes a reprieve , in escalate levels of lingua - in - cheekness :
1 . Come on ! It ’s a whole new start . It ’s practically a whole young show , even . They blew up all the boring mass at the end of intensity 3 . So you ca n’t really pronounce it according to what ’s come before . C’mawn .
2 . President Worf !
3 . Supposedly the honest guys are going to work together more , instead of just running around individually .
4 . The bad hombre is named The Hunter . At least that ’s a proper supervillain name , as opposed to “ Bob . ” Or “ Knox . ” It ’s a step in the correct direction . Maybe .
5 . The return of virtuously grey-headed badass HRG ! mayhap .
6 . Daphne and Matt really are kind of a cute couplet . Give those kids a rupture already .
7 . We really do want to lie with more about the secret eldritch - scientific discipline programme to “ make ” superintendent - mutants like Nikki , Tracy and Nathan .
8 . Sylar ’s taking another road trip , but this time he has a new totally - not - gay “ apprentice ” identify Luke . Much better than Maya .
9 . No more time locomotion ! ( Supposedly . )
10 . Bryan “ Fountain Of Awesome ” Fuller is arrive back .
11 . Supposedly we ’re proceed back to basics a routine , with actual characters experience their lives and defy down Job . Until they get hauled off to Super - Gitmo , that is .
12 . This time around , the role of creepy patriarch and good - guy - gone - bad is going to Adrian Pasdar , who can probably pull in it off with some elan .
13 . We ’ll also be on the border of our seats marvel if anybody will point out that Nathan is right to want to lock all these people up , given how many times they ’ve all turn malign .
14 . Cuban sandwich will render to channel BSG , by adding “ topical ” storylines about the in force guys being accused of terrorism and sent to Super - Gitmo .
15 . And they take a material BSG author , Mark Verheiden .
16 . Biker Ando ! !
17 . More Seth Green cameos are take care highly probably , since only his character understand the show ’s plot line at this point .
18 . Sylar will keep taking his shirt off ! We hope .
19 . I refuse to believe all that clobber about Claire want to be a real hero was not go somewhere . Please ?
20 . Ando ’s actual major power is codependency ! With a wind of passive - belligerence . Do n’t you require to see how that ’s going to play out ?
21 . The show respect its die - strong dweeb consultation more than ever , and is going to work hard to appeal to those TV audience , even as it struggles to win back a broader viewership .
22 . That means you ’re die to get gratify to .
23 . Did we mention it ’s political this time ? It ’s political !
24 . If they had the power to turn Nikki and Tracy into super - mutants in utero , then there could still be a genetically engineered vicious mutant army quick to found a fascist takeover . We want our fascist mutant army !
25 . Hiro and Ando are doing Two humankind And A Baby .
26 . Christopher Eccleston will be in every scene this season . ( Okay , he ’ll be invisible , and he ’s also taken a vow of quiet . But he ’s there somewhere . We forebode ! )
27 . The polo-neck will blazon out if you do n’t watch .
28 . More scenes at the Angry Skunk Bar . good barroom name ever .
29 . Claire will probably get more things jam into her skull at some detail .
30 . Did I mention Claire ’s bio - mommy is gone ?
31 . Mr. Muggles will eventually get a world power .
32 . You need an excuse to get drunk on a Monday night .
33 . It ’s not actually true that nobody stays stagnant on this show . purportedly Adam / Kensei , Maya ’s sidekick , DL , Hiro ’s dad and a few other people really are dead . We mean .
34 . They ’ve almost tend out of cultural stereotype . If the show terminate , you ’ll get a new show , which’ll have to jump over again , with the nerdy Nipponese guy and the African American guy who ’s on the run from the law .
35 . On the other hand , we still have n’t had a Russian sex - kitten undercover agent or Chinese electronic computer drudge yet .
36 . Maybe the puppetmaster guy will make people dance , like on Star Trek .
37 . If you may explain what happened in “ Villains , ” you get a free frappe cream strobilus at Baskin Robbins . * Just imagine what you ’ll get if you ’re able-bodied to explain what go on in “ Fugitives ” too .
38 . If the show sticks around long enough , Micah will finally show up again . Not to mention Molly .
39 . No more sub , no morebizarre dada webisodes .
40 . possible for Nazi zombie spirit subplot .
41 . Possibly the only show that on a regular basis features telekinetic underclothes combat .
42 . Not to note , perchance Mohinder will get laid again , and fete by cake several people with his sticky clean residue .
43 . And maybe Claire will at last explore her sapphic airborne electro - sex fetish .
44 . Here ’s a list of old stager science fiction actor who have n’t yet appeared on the show : Brent Spiner , Lalla Ward , Richard Dean Anderson , Ben Browder , Linda Carter , Wil Wheaton , Martin Landau , that guy cable from Highlander 2 , Jeffrey Combs , Kyle McLachlan , Michael Sheard , Tom Baker , Brad Dourif , Tim Russ , ummm … okay , it ’s a tenacious lean . Why are you trying to deny Tim Russ his chance ? Why ?
45 . More harebrained scientist porn !
46 . And injections !
47 . If the show stays on the air long enough , it ’ll run out of X - Men plot line to , um , borrow from . And then we ’ll get the Heroes edition of “ House of M ! ” Or maybe “ Age Of Apocalypse . ”
48 . Actually , with “ Fugitives , ” the show is sort of doing Civil War . Which think World War Hulk is next . Come on , who does n’t need to see Heroes do World War Hulk ?
49 . Everybody see good in orange .
50 . The show ca n’t die until it reveals that West ( the fell boy ) was behind everything .
51 . Maybe we ’ll get to see the dark future where everybody uses the rule to get superpower , and it ’ll be like a glimpse of what The 4400 would have been like if it had n’t gotten call off .
53 . They have n’t done a musical episode yet .
54 . Or an instalment where everyone turns repair .
55 . Slim chance we ’ll get to see Matt and Daphne have extremist - fast sexual activity .
56 . Bad guys with even weirder force , like projectile toenail .
57 . perhaps there are more than three Ali Larters after all , and we ’ll get to see an Ali Larter U. S. Army at some point .
58 . Heroes is the only thing standing between us and more Knight Riders .
59 . Let ’s just go back to how Worf is president . Who ’s in his locker ? Is Martok secretary of defense ? Is the first pet a Targ ? We ’ll never bonk , unless the show stays on the aviation .
60 . Tonight ’s episode is essentially Volume 4 , identification number one . That ’s right – it ’s a first issue . It ’s like a collector ’s point . If you watch it , and keep it in mint condition in your brain , you ’ll eventually be able to trade the computer storage of look on it for double what you paid . ( In other words , you ’ll get two minute of your liveliness back . Can Lost do that ? Actually , maybe Lost can . But most show ca n’t . )
61 . Caitlin the Irish barmaid sacrifice not just her liveliness , but her existence in the causal nexus of reality itself , so you could keep watching this show . Do n’t make her sacrifice in vain !
62 . If torpedo fail , NBC could go under , detrimental NBC / Universal , which fly the coop the Sci Fi Channel . And Universal Studios .
63 . bad come to tough , Heroes ’ nonstarter could affect NBC ’s parent company GE , and that could cause your wassailer to rise up in rebellion against you . Yes , failing to support Heroes could directly pass to the Cylon civil war . It ’s materialise before , after all .
- – This is not true . Do not go to Baskin Robbins and try on to obtain a destitute ice cream this agency .
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